Stories of Bad Kisses
Last night, I'm out at a bar in Newton. My friends and I get on the topic of bad kisses. I heard two of the worst stories that I have heard in long time. One of the belongs to this cute red headed artist girl and the other to my roommates girlfriend.
Story 1:
My roommate's girlfriend told us that her worst kiss was this guy that put his mouth over hers like sealant over a open hole. He opened his mouth and put his whole mouth over her lips.No tongue. No movement. She says that he did this for like 5 to 6 seconds.
What in the world was this man thinking? That was the first and last date with this fellow. Luckily for my roommate, 'cause if that was the quality of guy that he was competing with, it can't be that hard to beat that.
Story 2:
We name this bad kiss after R told the story. We called it the fish kiss. The fish kiss is given by a man with a fish head and dog's tongue. She told us that this man lick the perimeter of her face with his tongue, twice. Yes, licked her face, he licked in a clockwise direction.
I did not think that people can kiss that badly. Wow. These are true stories. If you kiss like any of the people describe in this story, please stop for the love of God. Kissing is not for you...
Story 1:
My roommate's girlfriend told us that her worst kiss was this guy that put his mouth over hers like sealant over a open hole. He opened his mouth and put his whole mouth over her lips.No tongue. No movement. She says that he did this for like 5 to 6 seconds.
What in the world was this man thinking? That was the first and last date with this fellow. Luckily for my roommate, 'cause if that was the quality of guy that he was competing with, it can't be that hard to beat that.
Story 2:
We name this bad kiss after R told the story. We called it the fish kiss. The fish kiss is given by a man with a fish head and dog's tongue. She told us that this man lick the perimeter of her face with his tongue, twice. Yes, licked her face, he licked in a clockwise direction.
I did not think that people can kiss that badly. Wow. These are true stories. If you kiss like any of the people describe in this story, please stop for the love of God. Kissing is not for you...
posted by djspeak at 11:32 AM
1 Comments:
I just recently had someone try to kiss me and do the 'sealant over a open hole' mouth thing. It really made me want to vomit, I've had some crappy kisses before, but this one was just ridiculous. Not to mention he tasted like beer and his lips were cold, yuk..
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