Ended silence

I have been quiet. This is been accurate of what my life has been like for the last week. OK… that is not completely accurate. I have traveled to the West coast for the first time. I’m out here visiting my friends that make me believe in fairy tales. They are the type of couple that makes you believe that your parents were not blowing smoke up your ass with the stories about when a boy meets a girl and they’ll live happily ever after.

SBS is a little crazy but what woman is not… I hope that y’all can see a joke when it is written. But I’m happy with the way that things are progressing. She is unsure how she feels about me. How she feels about us. But I think that it is too early for those types of thoughts. She tells me that she is confused. She just got out of her most serious relationship to date, in December. Not wanting to rush into something new, I imagine that she is still processing a little. Can I really be upset about that? All at the same time she is inviting me over to her place for the Sopranos. She is forward about showing affection. Clearly, she is enjoying that we are not simply just friends.

She is not the only one processing. We are on the slow track. This is not a bad thing; I remember so clearly why it is so great to be in an emotionally intimate relationship. It is not about the big gestures. It’s about the small ones. It is about her finding the nook in my shoulder, and it becoming her home away from home. It’s about SBS craving my warmth, my physical heat and it being the right temperature. My current problem is the knowing. If things go right, all that I just mentioned will become true. It is not true now…for me it is the anticipation that is causing the trouble.

We cook slow, so what we plan to ingest does not burn. And if you are patient, it, slow cooking turns out good more often than not.